The Davis Theory

The Gospel According to Conan

2010-01-22T22:09:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure but I think Conan O' Brien just gave me a bit of Gospel truth.

Like a lot of other people I've been following this NBC feud very closely. And as it's gone on my respect for Conan has grown immensely. I've always been a fan of Conan- but watching this controversy play out has allowed me to see a truly good man in the television industry.

That respect reached a pinnacle tonight. His final monologue was full of humility and grace- thanking NBC for his opportunities. He said something that stopped me in my tracks: " I'm asking this particularly of young people that watch- Please do not be cynical. I hate cynicism. For the record it's my least favorite quality. It doesn't lead anywhere." He's right! It got me thinking about how our cynicism in dealing with "the world" chokes out the gospel. How my constantly questioning others motives only leads to bitterness and promotes no good thing. The only thing cynicism seems to do for me is weigh-down the freedom in my soul. I'm not saying I've decided to abandon common sense. But i am saying maybe there is something more to being positive- to seeing the good in things- in people. To give respect even when another trys to take mine. To extend love before skepticism- mercy before judgment.

That's a tall order for me. But with the Almighty's help, well worth the undertaking.
Thanks for the preaching Conan. I hope I see ya in September.

Good Friday

2009-04-10T05:26:00.000-07:00

Have a meaningful Good Friday everybody.

dig it.

Let's Talk About Mary

2009-04-05T09:11:00.000-07:00

There is a broad gap between how Catholics and Pentecostals feel about Mary the mother of Jesus. Catholics venerate Mary very highly- above all other saints. While Pentecostals for the most part believe that she was simply chosen because she was willing and obedient. What do you think? Was she immaculately conceived? Did she ascend into Heaven? Is she the Queen of Heaven? Most importantly, should she receive more veneration then we currently give her as Pentecostals?

Well? So what do you think?

Murder in the City

2009-04-05T09:04:00.000-07:00

The Avett Brothers are definitely worth looking into. You'll like this.

dig it.

The Low Anthem

2009-03-05T10:54:00.000-08:00

If your a fan of good Americana music or just a fan of good music in general, do yourself a favor and check these guys out. No seriously, you need to check it out.

The Prosperity through Pain Gospel. Part 2

2009-03-05T07:45:00.000-08:00

(Note: This blog is not meant to be a complete treatise on why we have pain. For a good start on that subject check out C.S. Lewis' The Problem with Pain.)

We need to realize pain is a part of our fallen world. We were never promised what we consider a fair deal; that if we work hard we'll be fine. We we're never guaranteed physical and financial well-being. Jesus said we would have trouble. It was a guarantee. But he also said to fear not because he has overcome the world.

Through Christ everything works for are good even if we never understand why or how it works for our good. It is important to remember when the hard times come (and if they haven't, they will) that anything God allows to happen to us is for are ultimate good and even more importantly, his ultimate glory.

He really does love us and even if he disciplines us it's out of a heart that defines the word love. He is not angry at us. We are his children and he does everything out of his perfect love for us.

All the pain that we experience, that our Father allows us to experience, is so that we might become more like Christ. That is where true prosperity is found.

dig it.

The Prosperity thru Pain Gospel: Pt. 1

2009-02-27T15:48:00.000-08:00

Your Cross

The everlasting God has in His wisdom
foreseen from eternity the cross
that He now presents to you
as a gift from His inmost Heart.

This cross He now sends you
He has considered with His all-knowing eyes,
understood with His divine mind,
tested with His wise justice,
warmed with His loving arms
and weighed with His own hands
to see that it be not one inch too large
and not one ounce too heavy for you.

He has blessed it with His holy Name,
anointed it with His grace,
perfumed it with His consolation,
taken one last glance at you
and your courage, and then sent it
to you from heaven,
a special greeting from God to you,
an alms of the all-merciful love of God.

St. Francis de Sales

"In this world you will have trouble..."

Where did we ever get the idea that our American prosperity is the way life is supposed to be. Or worse, that we deserve it; that we're entitled to it. We need to realize we we're never promised financial abundance (at least as we commonly define it), that the financial blessings we do receive are so that we might help others.

Americans (myself included) have squandered a lof of our provisions on our selves, indulging in the gratification of possesion. Bigger cars, bigger houses, aquire, aquire, aquire. Bigger is better. More is better. In short, our stockpile is our security.

But now our chickens appear to be coming home to roost. Our economy is in deep, deep, trouble. Thousands of people are losing their jobs at an alarming rate. We can no longer depend on our savings, investments, or 401 K; and if this current Congressional plan doesn't work we'll be in more debt than ever.

I'm not sure where all of this is heading. I'm not saying our downfall is near. Obviously, I don't know. But I am sure as Christ followers we need to examine our perception of prosperity and pain. What would it mean for Christ followers if we we're totally stripped of our financial prosperity and security?

More to come...

Happy Trails

2009-02-24T01:55:00.000-08:00

I'm ready for an adventure; let's call it a musical adventure. I'm ready for music that blows my mind. I'm ready for that magic that leaves me wondering how it was even possible.

I have a fear of growing stale, of getting stuck in a rut; listening to the same music i listened to when I was 25; never caring to broaden my musical horizons. Not that I don't love the music I listen to now, I do but I'm ready for something new.

The time I have to explore is limited and my financial provisions are low. So, if there is anyone out there who's had there mind blown lately musically and could maybe even point me to where I could get my mind blown for free legally, I would be very grateful indeed.

dig it.

White Knuckles

2009-02-16T18:47:00.000-08:00

Fear can cause us so much pain. Psalm 37:8 tells us "Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing."

I think fear is a major cause of sin. We fear rejection, so we lie. We fear losing, so we hoard. We fear the wounding of our pride, so we don't hold our tongue when we should. I believe some Pentecostals are afraid of losing their heritage, their doctrine on speaking in tongues, and it keeps us from being united with the entire body of Christ. I think this fear is why so many Pentecostals look on other denominations with suspicion and arrogance (arrogance being a wall to protect the ego).

I was always a little afraid of Baptists growing up. I was taught that they didn't "preach the whole bible". And yet other times I looked at them with a certain measure of pity, thinking, "Well, I hope they make it to heaven." I think this line of thought that I and many other Pentecostals (particularly COG) grew up with stems from the persecution of the church in its infancy. The Methodist and Baptist churches that the early Pentecostals came from did not look favorably on this new movement. I think for this reason the church put up walls to protect itself from the animosity as well as the doctrines of other denominations. It did not, and does not, want to allow itself to be informed by other traditions, fearing the corruption of it's own doctrine. This is much to our detriment.

W e have much to learn from other traditions. And I believe the high points of Pentecostalism could be of benefit to other traditions. We need to at least do our part and let down our guard towards other denominations (truth has nothing to fear) and attempt to interact with other parts of the body of Christ, not trying to convert Catholics or Baptists to our faith but just interacting in humble dialogue, willing to learn from members of our family in Christ. If we realize that in most cases we agree on much more than we disagree on, that speaking in tongues, while important, is not essential to faith in Christ (1 Corinthians 14:5-19), then I believe through the unifying power of the Holy Spirit some beautiful dialogue could occur and maybe, just maybe, we'd start to function more like a body.

dig it.

(Note: I try not to input a whole lot of scripture into my blogs. I'm very uncomfortable using scripture to back up my arguments. I guess I felt it safe to do so this time.)

Celebrate Recovery: Pentecostalism

2009-02-14T20:09:00.000-08:00

Guilt. Legalism. Two addictions I've battled for longer than I care to admit. Two addictions that have damaged me more than I realize. From begging God's forgiveness countless times a day for any negative thought, to asking God to "sanctify" any evil in any inanimate object (door knobs, pens, etc.) or animate being (other people, animals, my own fingers!) that I happened to be in contact with, that I "infected", while having said negative thoughts. Crazy? Ya, I've been there. All in the fear of losing my salvation and missing the rapture at any moment. ( Sings: Wish we'd all been ready.)

To be honest I don't know exactly where or when it started. I was born into a pentecostal family, raised in the Church of God. I was happy as a kid, free. Getting into the rambunctious sort of mischief that boys tend to get into. But in my teenage years I began taking God more seriously. I began moving towards a self-wrought holiness, a deriding myself of all "worldly" things that could separate me from God. (i.e. secular music, even Christian music that wasn't "Christian" enough.) Around the age of nineteen are when things started to take a more serious turn. I felt compelled to share my faith out of fear of judgment. I bought tracks to place in public restrooms and anywhere else I felt compelled. I recall one particular instance of witnessing to a temp at my place of employment on his last day as he was literally walking out the door because I felt it was my last opportunity to save him from hell. So I went to hand him a track and he says " No thanks." as he pulls his necklace out of his shirt to show me a medallion. I say "What's that?" Unable to decipher the small medallion's image. "It's a Buddha." he says. "Oh, well have a good one." That's right, I never even got to know the guy before I felt compelled to thrust my faith at him with a track. It was around this time when the severe legalism I described earlier began to surface.

The heaviest legalism lasted maybe a year until by God's grace I just stopped caring. I knew I couldn't do it anymore. He brought friends into my life who had a better understanding of what grace was and it rubbed off on me. I was slowly able to let go of my more severe habits. I still struggle with legalism, trying to earn my grace from God. But in the past year he has really shown me what his grace really means. That I don't have to do anything for him to love me, he takes me as I am. That only through the power of the Holy Spirit I can be any less of a mess than I am. My heart just need be open to him.

I know Pentecostals are not the only believers that struggle with legalism. Nor am i trying to place the blame solely on it. To a certain extent this addiction has to do with my personality make-up. I also know every Pentecostal doesn't struggle with legalism. But I think the potential is there. A message that is many times geared towards good works combined with emphasis on spiritual warfare can lead to a dependence on one's hard-earned efforts for salvation. Shadowing the fact that grace is free in the first place.

dig it.

Homecoming.

2009-02-06T18:39:00.000-08:00

I miss Tennessee tonight. I miss the way I felt there. The one thing that gave me pause when deciding to move back hear a year and a half ago was the awareness of what I would describe at the the time as a materialistic approach to life. I did not know how deep it ran or how much it would affect me, how much it would wear on me. I never realized in Tennessee that there wasn't much of a class differentiation at least not one that had a real affect on me. (I will allow Uncle Tupelo to explain.) Here, there is an almost palpable anxiety in the air. It says "make more money, drive a nicer car, own a prettier home but above all perform, perform, perform. You must have your act together at all times." I can't stand it. I try to get away from it, to get out from underneath it, but it's just so heavy. I feel like if I could just get back to Tennessee, I could breathe better. I miss the acceptance of my friends. I miss their creativity, their energy. I miss the life I shared with them.

No, I have no plans to move back. This is where the Almighty seems to have us and we have grown here in many different ways. But tonight, tonight I miss Cleveland. I know she's not the sweetest girl but if you live there, treat her right. She deserves it.

dig it.
(Oh yeah, it's nice to be back. Hopefully I'll be able to blog some more but no promises this time.)

What happened?

2008-07-23T14:05:00.000-07:00

For anybody that cares, sorry I haven't blogged in a while. We're in the process of buying our first home which entails moving out of our old place, moving in with my parents for a month, and closing this coming Monday with the move-in that weekend. Add to that Katy working at target nights and weekends about 20 hrs a week and me helping out with the youth band at church we've been kinda pressed for time. Things should settle down after we move-in and get into a groove so I hope to get back to bloggin' soon. I miss it. I'm enjoying it. I hope you are. If not, I didn't like you anyway and to tell you the truth, nobody else does. They told me so.

dig it.

I'm Through with Being a Christian

2008-06-17T14:31:00.000-07:00

Well, at least as it's popularly defined. Before you start calling me Davis the Apostate; allow me to explain:

There is a system that crept into evangelical Christianity somewhere along the way. A system that relies on doing good deeds more than it relies on grace. It seems to say you will be saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ but the rest is up to you. You have to be good from the point of conversion on for God to love you and so help you if you fail because God is just waiting there to snatch away the gift of salvation that he so hesitatingly bestowed upon you in the first place. So we go forth trying to play the part; acting good, acting like we have everything together to show ourselves and others that we are good and God's favor is upon us because of our righteousness. Scared to show any chinks in the armor because that would negate our holiness, destroy our "witness", and render us totally undesirable and useless to God (who had doubts about you to begin with.) Horse poo!

Sadly, this seems to be the prevailing view of non-believers in relation to Christianity. Two positions are likely to arise from non-believers with this view on Christianity: 1. "Christians are hypocrites because they are no where near as holy as they act or think they are." People can see our faults a lot easier than we think they can. 2. "I could never be a Christian because I'm not good enough."

In either case I can't say I blame them for not believing. If this is what Christianity is I'm done. I'm not saying people who believe this way aren't believers but they aren't as free as they could be. For me, being a follower of Christ means redefining this popular view of Christianity. It means not living within this system trying to prove to everyone I'm a believer because I say and do the right things all the time. Not that we shouldn't try to do good, we should; but it is by no means what we should hang our hats on. The good we do should be out of our love and gratitude for Christ. Not out of a sense of indebtedness; we'll never get out of the red. Not to prove to others how good we are; Christianity isn't that self-serving. People won't believe us or they won't feel they can measure up.

I'm beginning to realize that God loves me (no, I mean for real), his grace is bigger than my mistakes, that he won't let me go no matter what; I'm not going to worry about being perfect anymore. I want to be more vulnerable, willing to say I don't have all the answers or even most of them; that I fall constantly. God help me, I'm no longer going to carry a burden that I was never meant to carry. Through Christ I'm his child; He's not angry at me. He'll always be there whether I screw it up or don't and he's not looking for me to pay him back or return the favor because grace always has and always will be unmerited.

dig it.

Ya, your right. This blog sounded a little reformed. I may be listening to Steve Brown and Michael Spencer to much. I'm definitely feeling their influence but I don't think that's a bad thing.

I can't handle this. I' don't think the world can handle this.

2008-06-12T14:16:00.000-07:00

As most of you know; we all have a choice to make in this life. We choose to use are powers for good or for awesome. Boston and Michael Sweet have made that choice. They have chosen wisely. In the past they used their powers for awesome separately. They now combine to bring about an awesomeness here to for never experienced by man. In short, Michael Sweet is the lead singer of Boston. This planet will never be the same.

Here is but a taste of the power to be witnessed on their summer tour:
Tom Sholz and Gary Pihl of Boston playing with Stryper at a benefit show for the Station Nightclub fire.

dig it.

Intent

2008-06-02T14:53:00.000-07:00

Great music always make me want to play music, always makes me miss playing.

My last serious music venture ended over three years ago. It's felt like a lifetime. I haven't spent every moment since then pining for Bigger than Dallas (The best band ever, if you never saw us well you missed something that surpasses anything that you will ever see. Ever.) I do still miss playing with Rob and Callie, the great times, the camaraderie, the music. BTD was my life, my identity. It didn't matter as much what crappy job I had because that wasn't me. I was a bass player playing music and that's all I wanted to do, to be.

Since my time with BTD has come to an end I've felt rather lost. I've had no certain idea what to do with myself or really, who I am. Now I know what you do is not who you are but still, it's very important to me that what ever I spend the majority of my time dong have real purpose, real intent. I need to feel like I'm working towards something. Whether it be reading (to acquire knowledge that I feel with be useful now or sometime down the road), writing, or playing music. I need to feel like I'm really using my God-given abilities not just toiling away at a job. I don't think I'm better than anybody who just works a day job but I feel like I have talents that can't reach their full potential in an insurance office.

Now you may be asking "So what do you want to do?" I don't know. That's what's frustrating. I still want to play sweet, sweet, rock n' roll but at this point in time, with two amazing little girls to raise; I'm not willing to sacrifice my family on the altar of rock. I want to play shows but I'm not ready for an all out effort right now. The real problem is time. I want to read. I want to write. I want to play music but finding the unobstructed time to do so is not easy. I'm not trying to make this an "I hate my day job" blog. I really don't. It's a good job with good benefits that is a blessing in our down-turned economy. I guess I'm looking for fulfillment on an "artistic" (man I hate writing that word, it feels so pretentious) level. I'm sure this issue will resolve itself in the fullness of God's mercy and time. Summoning the patience and perseverance for that time is the hard part. Enough of my whining, I'm out.

Here's a little Tom Petty. Sometimes we need Tom to get us through the day.

dig it.

Validation

2008-05-27T18:53:00.000-07:00

Happy belated St. Joan of Arc day everybody! (Friday)

Note: This blog is basically a continuation of the "my sympathies" blog. I've had a heavy religious focus lately. Sorry if it bores you, it's just on my mind a great deal and I like writing about it so I shouldn't apologize, I take it back. I think part of me is wanting to explain myself to my Pentecostal friends, let'em know where I am at. This blog unfortunately came off pretty basic, I had a hard time getting a good handle on it and I'm not really sure why. Maybe I need some sleep. Anyway I'll try to blog about something else soon. (If I feel like it sucka-punk!)

Liturgy

Lit"ur*gy\, n.; pl. Liturgies. [F. liturgie, LL. liturgia, Gr. ? a public service, the public service of God, public worship; (assumed) ?, ?, belonging to the people, public (fr. ?, ?, the people) + the root of ? work. See Lay, a., and Work.] An established formula for public worship, or the entire ritual for public worship in a church which uses prescribed forms; a formulary for public prayer or devotion. In the Roman Catholic Church it includes all forms and services in any language, in any part of the world, for the celebration of Mass. Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, © 1996, 1998 MICRA, Inc

Along with my Anglo-Catholic leanings has come an interest in and a love for liturgical Christianity. Within it, I have found a great deal of good spirituality and methodology. I love the focus on Christ in the liturgical service (or the divine liturgy) and the reverence that is shown him. I believe that sometimes in the evangelical community we focus so much on Jesus being our friend we neglect to show him the respect that is due him as God. Coupled with this Christ-centered aspect is a strong emphasis on the reading of scripture. A selection is read from the Psalms, Old Testament, New Testament and a passage from the Gospels intentionally possessing the words of Christ. With some churches maybe only using two verses in a service, I believe a heavy scriptural content to be a crucial element.

The greatest thing about the divine liturgy to me however, is partaking in the Holy Eucharist. I don't think I can adequately describe the joy I receive from this unification with Christ, this consuming of grace, it is an absolutely wonderful mystery. I can't tell you whether I believe in transubstantiation or consubstantiation, I don't know. I do believe however, it's so much more than juice and crackers. I'm not sure why we would need fear being unworthy of the Eucharist if it's just Welch's and Saltines, there simply has to be more to it.

Liturgical Christianity has also influenced my personal spiritual life. I've really gotten into reading the daily lectionary from the Book of Common Prayer. http://justus.anglican.org/resources/bcp/
So far I've really just read the morning lectionary during the week but coupled with the Anglican Rosary http://companyofjesus.net/beads.html it really has enhanced my spiritual life, it's really brought a stability to my morning that has never really been there. No other type of devotional style has ever stuck. While this may just be something that suits my personality it really has brought fulfillment, ease of use, and consistency to my devotional time.

This blog should have been more in-depth. Maybe that can come later when I have more mental energy to give to the subject matter but for now I'm open to discussion.

dig it.

(I'm not really sure why this blog is italicized after the definition. I couldn't turn it off.)

Take a deep breath, Count to Ten.

2008-05-22T15:18:00.001-07:00

The further I go I'm convinced that nothing good ever comes from worrying. Jesus tells us explicitly not to worry but it's a tough lesson to learn.

When it comes to how we react to our culture we Christians often times react in a spirit of worry or fear that leads to actions of anger and irrationality which in turn, always reflects poorly on the body of Christ

Recently, I listened to a Brown Sessions podcast from Steve Brown Etc. recorded late last year which became the catalyst for this blog. http://stevebrownetc.com/2007/12/podcasts/the-brown-sessions/the-golden-compass-jeffery-overstreet/ It was an interview with Jeffrey Overstreet from Christianity Today about the film The Golden Compass but it quickly morphed into a conversation about how Christians react to these kind of pop culture events. The example of Harry Potter was brought up and if you recall the overwhelming Christian response was not at all pleasant. Well, at it turned out, J.K. Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter series was and is a Christian. http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1572107/20071017/index.jhtml
I'm not sure what her specific beliefs are, but the fact that the Christian community as a whole trashed her at the start without really giving her a fair shake is an embarrassing black eye for we knee-jerk Christians.

Two things I think we need to remember:

First, we need to look deeply into issues and gather all the facts we can before we speak (if we need speak at all).

Secondly, we need to remember that we do not battle against flesh and blood. There is no reason for us to hate, scream at, or spit on anyone. It seems to me Jesus only got angry at the impious religious leaders of his day. So we need to be certain that when we speak, we must speak the truth, in love, constantly seeking the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. "How we say something is sometimes more important that what we are saying."

So take a deep breath, count to ten, and don't worry, we're gonna be OK.

dig it.

footnote: The quote and a heavy nod go to Steve Brown on this blog.

My sympathies

2008-05-17T14:06:00.000-07:00

Hold on tight, this is a long one.

I suppose it's time I confess something. I hesitate to say it for the alarms that it may raise about my salvation. But I feel I need to say it, to get it off my chest.
I'm Cathlicostal. Well, maybe Anglicostal.

"Your what?"

"Cathlicostal."

"What's that?"

"I'm glad you asked."

For over a year my Catholic sympathies have been increasing. Out of reading St. Augustine and reading about him, St. Francis, St. Thomas Aquinas, and various other writings such as Chesterton's "Orthodoxy" their has grown a real love for the beauty in the Catholic tradition. I love the ancient faith and heritage it represents. I love the symbolism and art it contains. Albeit, it certainly has it stains (all traditions do,) I still find myself drawn to its finer attributes.

There is a part of me that wants to attach myself to the original church. Growing up pentecostal it had slipped by me what a protestant was, "a protest-ant." I was in protest, in rebellion against Rome and the original church. This didn't sit well with me. I remembered the Bible had some strong words against rebellion. So I attempted to examine and reflect upon the Reformation (in an untrained, layman way.) I attempted to find if God's hand was really in it or if he chose to work in spite of this Rebellion, there were things that needed to be addressed in the Church at that time but I wasn't sure that breaking away was the answer.

I've come to believe he is at work in protestant movements as well as the Catholic tradition, that he uses them, but I don't think this was the original plan. A terrible side effect of this Reformational split being the ease in which other consequential splits have come to pass. Consequentially, the world doesn't believe us because we lack unity. Why should they believe us when we don't believe each other? At this point in time my hope is that the prayer of Jesus "that they all be one" would come to pass in the acknowledgement, the agreement, that different christian traditions can account for the different parts of the body of Christ. That is, if we can't truly be under one universal name.

Now , questions you may be asking and some of which I'm still asking myself:

Do Catholics worship Mary?

No, at least their not supposed to. I believe Catholics can put to much of a focus on Mary but I also believe that we protestants, particularly we evangelicals don't show her enough respect. We seem to act as if anybody could have been the Blessed Mother.

Do they worship the Pope?

Nope. He is not considered a deity.

What about the infallibility of the Pope?

As I understand it, Their belief is that the Holy Spirit keeps him from speaking erroneously about church doctrine and whom am I to say how the Holy Spirit can work.

What the deal with the saints?

To me, the saints are Godly examples to draw inspiration from. I say this with great trepidation but as far as praying for the prayers of the saints and the Blessed Mother so that they may in turn pray on our behalf, (I'm going to get excommunicated for this,) I really don't have a problem with it. I want as many people as possible praying for me, living or dead. Now do I think their should be a good deal of moderation in our veneration and prayer to the saints? Absolutely, anything that doesn't ultimately point to Christ has no business in our spiritual lives.

Now their are certainly more questions that should and need to be asked but this blog is growing longer and longer so I must move on. I know they're could be a lot of comments, questions, and concerns which you are welcomed to direct at me, I'll try to answer them the best I can. I'm no expert.

To the "costal" side, I must say I still believe in speaking messages in other languages through the power of the Holy Spirit and the essential interpretation of those messages given by the same beautiful Paraclete but their are some things in the pentecostal realm that concern me. Issues ranging from doctrine to methodology that will have to wait for another blog.

There is so much more I want to write about. Such as my love of the liturgical side of Christianity and the value in it but that will have to wait for another day. I hope this is a good start.

dig it.

Mudcrutch

2008-05-17T09:32:00.000-07:00

Mudcrutch is Tom Petty's new project. Well actually, it's a band he was in back in the 70's that was a springboard for him and some of the heartbreakers after their label broke them up. It's definitely worth your time.

dig it.

To blog or not to blog

2008-05-17T06:31:00.001-07:00

"any utterance is a major assumption of responsibility" Richard Weaver

So I finally got internet at the house a couple of months ago and I thought hey, this will be great! I can keep up with friends and blog- it'll be sweet! But as it turns out I'm not that great at keeping up with people on-line (call me old fashioned but I'd rather just talk to ya on the phone.) I had a bigger and scarier revelation when it came to blogging- It turned out that I had nothing to write about, I didn't feel I had anything to say and that petrified me! I wondered if my life was that dull and commonplace as to have nothing worth sharing. But I've come to believe the lack of subject matter can be linked to three reasons:

1. Fear of accountability.
Not that my blogs would hold any type of weight or garner any type of attention or care but I'm leary of half-baked blogging on serious subject matter and the needless, perhaps dangerous paths they can take us down. So I hesitate to blog about subjects I'm not fairly confident in.

2. Fear of offending.
This probably lends to my non-confrontational nature, I'm scared of arguing, scared I'll be proven wrong (shallow and prideful I know), scared of hurt feelings and hurt friendships. But at the same time I think it's time I come around and start being true to myself regardless of the consequences, I mean Jesus certainly wasn't scared of making enemies and their certainly are people out their who need offending. (Not that all blogs would be of a serious, controversial nature but still,. I've certainly had rants in the past.)

3. Fear of vulnerability.
This third reason constitutes the main reason for my lack of subject matter. I realized I didn't have anything I could write about because their was nothing I was willing to open up about, I wanted to write in an engaging manner without engaging myself. But I'm beginning to realize that only by vulnerability I become myself , and this blog has been a practice of it.

A looming footnote to all of this is asking myself why I want to blog in the first place. Maybe I should go back to reason one, but I think I'll figure that out later.

dig it.